Nursing... Are You Mine?
At 5:45 PM on
Friday, June 30, 2006
Within this past few weeks, many activities murdered my body. You read it right.
Murdered my body.
Even if we are only second year in nursing here at the University of Santo Tomas, marami na agad ang pumasok sa isip ko. After all the 5 hour orientation(almost everyday) and return demo that we did just within this week, it left my mind thinking something that I never imagined to come in my mind especially in normal situations like this...
Para sa akin ba tong Nursing?
Well, if I'm going to remember why I chose this course just 2 years ago, i couldn't fully narrate what really happened. All I know is that Communication Arts was my choice at heart for since I was 13 I already dreamt of becoming a broadcaster. But it was like waking up one early morning and already embedded to the reality that I am now a nursing student.
Yesterday, we did our FIRST return demo. Medical asepsis. Aseptic techniques. Glove-wearing. Getting BP. And with all these activities, I fully knew that I wasn't really good enough. After taking BP, our CI even told me that my BP is too high for my age and asked me to observe my CHOLESTEROL LEVEL. I don't know but I guess it's my stress that made me have that "blood intensity" (or just taht I'm really having a hypertension due to bad diet). That is why i could say that the activities mudered my body.
I couldn't trust myself. Feeling ko kasi mali mali ako. Ako kasi 'yong tipo ng tao na kapag may tumitingin, nacoconscious ako at hindi na ako nakkapagfocus sa mga ginagawa ko. And I think it's an attitide that a future nurse should not have, right?It's like thinking that Nursing wasn't really mine. I couldn't imagine sick and healthy people depending on me. I'm not the type of person who really cares physically. Hindi talaga ako 'yon. All i could ask is...
God, is this Your way of teaching me how to trust myself and let people trust me and believe that they can trust me? Or a challenge to know if I can decide for myself? Kung para sakin ba 'to? O nagkamali lang ako?
All I can do now is observe and feel free and feel excited to new experiences maging sa mga darating na parentheral injections na magagnap.. bahala na si Kuya Jess na magbigy ng way and signs para malaman ko ang sagot sa mga tanong ko.
Jessbless me...
Love,bEbAng
